I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
false alarm, still single
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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