This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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