nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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