Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
