She's JV to your varsity
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
