Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
