Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
