I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
