i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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