Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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