clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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