I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Randomize
