You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
