this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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