a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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