you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
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