He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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