gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
