Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Randomize
