Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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