dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
