Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize