Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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