it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
