So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
