This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize