He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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