Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
