you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
