She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
