Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
