I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Bring me that man meat
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
