I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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