OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
