So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Randomize
