Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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