I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
