i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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