You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
