I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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