ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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