My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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