I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
