guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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