Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
