thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
