I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Randomize
