I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
