there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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