this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
You had me at "let me see your balls"
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
