Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
